What is Love? The Joy of Friendship…

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My heart has many rooms and every so often I am amazed by it’s limitless capacity.  The subject on my mind today is friends because my friends are da bomb lol! Seriously, friendship has always played a big role in my life, ever a source of happiness, joy and comfort.  Well, most days anyway 🙂

Consider that the love of your parents is a given.  Supposedly, it is a biological necessity to love and care for one’s young.  When it comes to romantic love, we are programmed from an early age, “_ _ _ _ and _ _ _ _ _ sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage…”  because it is one of life’s most desirable experiences and it is, when we get it right. Don’t forget that we are held captive by our brains and the chemicals which flood it, ensuring our need for intimacy and companionship.

Friends are a completely different matter, not dependent upon biological ties, or required for the succession of our race, or even our need for intimacy and the fulfillment of sexual urges.  Yet, we all need friends.  I feel so bad for people when they tell me they have no friends. I mean, who has their back? Who talks them down from the edge when it is all too much to bear? Who shares in and dries their tears? Who does mad things with them that they can laugh about like idiots, over and over and over again? Who finishes their sentences because they just know what they are going to say? I mean, even House, a professed misanthropist, has one friend. Friendship, with all of life’s capriciousness, is one of the supreme gifts and pleasures that we are guaranteed and all we have to do to cement it is – open our hearts.

I have been blessed with friendships that have run the span of my lifetime and believe that such relationships carry their own specialness because you’ve shared in each other’s history.  This knowledge gives you a deep understanding of a person, regardless of who they become.  People at their core remain pretty much stay the same.  No other type of friendship has the strength, or perspective of the ones formed in childhood.  Childhood is a groovy time because you are untainted, able to be open and trusting, not saddled by fear, disappointments or caution. 

True friendship endures, standing the test of time, regardless of the many changes that life brings and those are the best kinds, don’t you find?  I have had the joy of reconnecting with childhood friends after decades of absence, thanks to Facebook or reunions, and it’s so cool that we mesh seamlessly – still.  We like each other, even all grown up. 

Here is my verbal montage, a tribute to my friends:

Thank you for the many times that you have been my strength when I was ready to give up.  Thank you for being my Brothers and my Sisters, regardless of what race, or class, or sex, you hail from.  Thank you for running away with me when we were kids – I still can’t believe so many of you did that.  Thank you for our forays to the beach and laying in the shore with me as the waves took us over.  Thank you for bearing up under my obsession with lipstick and running around with my lip print on your faces – I dig it it that you never complain.  Thank you for cursing me out and snapping me back to reality when I needed it.  Thank you for pointing out the silver lining in the clouds and waiting for rainbows to come because they always do.  Thank you so much for being – You.  Thank you for getting shit faced with me and running through the streets yelling and not caring that people were staring.  Thank you for defending me against all enemies – foreign, domestic and interior.  Thank you for laughing at my crazy jokes, putting up with my occasional withdrawals and ongoing fight against technological seduction.  Thank you for listening to me bitch and moan about everyday PITA’s like my boss, men, women, my height, my cats, my hair and the dysfunctional clan that is my blood family.  Thank you, thank you, thank you for the many times that you held me, literally or figuratively, when it was all too much and I finally broke down and cried.  Thank you for the trips to Vegas, St. Louis, almost Paris, Strip clubs, Dance clubs, Bars, Diners, Pizza Parlors and Off-broadway plays.  Thank you for seeing me, no matter what mask I wear.  Thank you for the Lobster dinners, Oodles of Noodles, vats of wine, girl’s nights out, exposure to other cultures, Absinthe, when it was still illegal, and for giving me empathy and compassion, it has carried me a long, long way.  Most of all, thank you for your love, willingness to dive alongside me into the thoughts that swirl in my cranium and supporting me on my search for the marvelous, on any given day. 

I will love you – always…


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